The only effective way to think about other people’s opinions
A little note to all those who still struggle with external negativity
No matter what you do.
If you are doing something. If you are trying to change the world in your own humble and unique way, if you are putting your word out there on the vast prairies of the internet, exposing yourself, making yourself visible and transparent, vulnerable and wide-open, there will always be someone who will come to hate.
Even if you work on yourself in silence, some of your “friends” who will have noticed your efforts will come to ridicule you and your first unconfident steps.
Consider it as part of the fun.
Bear in mind:
Dogs are barking, but the caravan moves on.
Eventually, one sunny day you will be stricken by a beautiful insight:
Everything that people say is irrelevant to your success.
There is a simple criterion to filter off all those whose opinions can be instantly discarded (or ignored, for the lack of a better word). In order for an opinion to be good enough to be taken into consideration, it should come from a person who is objectively better than you in the area of personal development in which the opinion is given.
And it is not like these persons are better human beings per se, it is just that they have higher expertise in a certain domain and hence it would only make sense to learn from them.
For instance, I can listen to ripped fitness gurus on youtube about healthy nutrition, I can read professional literature to get insight into my industry, and I will never get tired to return to the guidance of spiritual teachers that speak to me through books and podcasts. But when a stranger comes to me and starts teaching me how to live my life it truly amazes me and I have nothing but one question to that person.
“Excuse me…who are you?” 🤔
To all haters out there, I have a message: if you are stuck at the level when you leave negative comments considering it a way to bolster your self-esteem, then I feel terribly sorry for you.
“It must be so dull in your little world”.
Personally, I see being rude as a form of mental disability. And I am sorry if it sounds like an offense to people who are actually disabled (no ill intent). But how else can you perceive a person who fell victim to his own defective beliefs about life and deformed self-image?
If a person has failed to learn manners by a certain age, then he deserves nothing but compassion. Look closely, and you will see that the words that come out of the mouths of opinionated people can always be used to assess the depth of their misery as well as the shallowness of their intellect. A person who is intellectually capable of a respectful argument will never lower himself to the level of verbal abuse.
As to my fellow truth seekers, who still struggle with a lack of assertiveness, next time you see an unwelcomed incoming opinion say:
“Oh, my apologies good Sir! I think you confuse me with someone who gives a shit about what you think.” 🧐
Sarcasm is your bulletproof vest from the verbal attacks. What works even better is saying a simple “thank you”. Gratitude is disarming. Trying to hurt a person who has mastered gratitude is like trying to punch the air. Good luck trying that.
Here is an ancient Chinese proverb that I really like:
An opinion is like an asshole. Everyone has it, but it doesn’t mean you have to put it in everyone’s face.
Just friendly reminder to those who seem to “overexpose their bigoted butts”.
Sometimes people ask me how they struggle to take action because they are afraid of the criticism of people. And again I won’t get tired to repeat: the only person who doesn’t have to deal with haters is the one who does nothing.
So here is the deal: you can do nothing and stay in the safe zone, playing with the moss that is slowly engulfing you. Or you can go with the alternative:
- Do something with your life and learn how not to give a shit on the way.
And I can promise you that, as the more you progress on the path of becoming a decent human being, the more you will see how the items on your give-a-shit list exfoliate and disintegrate.
So now what are you waiting for? Haven’t you seen what the cup on the cover picture told you?
So, begin. Cups don’t give bullshit advice.